Someone in one of our local support groups shared this article about resilience with me recently. It applies to those coping with a neurological diagnosis.
The article addresses the four “simple skills” of super-resilient people:
* No matter what, choose to be a survivor.
* View every single setback as an opportunity.
* Go ahead and dote on yourself a bit.
* Don’t go it alone.
How to Bounce Back from Anything
Resilience can be learned: Here are the secrets of people who hang tough in hard times.
by Jancee Dunn
Healthy Living Magazine
Why is it that some people can rebound from a difficult event, but others never quite seem to get their mojo back? While it’s true that resilience comes more easily to some of us, the good news is that anybody can learn to be more emotionally hardy. Super-resilient people, it turns out, do a few specific things right — and these are simple skills we can all pick up.
Secret No. 1
No Matter What, Choose to be a Survivor
When we face bad news, it’s hard not to jump to extreme conclusions. (“I’ll never work again!” “It’s definitely a tumor!”) But resilient people steer clear of this kind of catastrophic thinking, which ups stress levels, blocks purposeful action, and leads to a downward spiral. Instead, do what Nora Ephron recommended: “Be the heroine of your life, not the victim.” You can’t always control what happens to you — but you can control your attitude and actions.
Secret No. 2
View Every Single Setback as an Opportunity
The most resilient people realize that a setback such as a layoff, health scare, or conflict at home can be a challenge and a chance to grow, notes New York psychotherapist Jeffery R. Rubin, PhD, author of “The Art of Flourishing.” “Success is often an obstacle to learning,” he says. “When everything is going well, we continue to do what worked, so we don’t learn much. But a crisis can lead to a breakthrough.”
Secret No. 3
Go Ahead and Dote on Yourself a Bit
Physical health is a pillar of resilience. Before and during a crisis, it’s essential to have healthy habits like getting enough sleep, eating well, exercising, and avoiding mood changers like alcohol and other vices. Beyond that, yoga may be especially beneficial. In a 2012 study from Harvard Medical School, students who practiced yoga for 10 weeks were better able to calm themselves when upset compared with those who did a standard gym regimen. “Yoga promotes self-regulation, which is the ability to step back from a situation and not be reactive,” says Jessica J. Noggle, PhD, one of the researchers.
Secret No. 4
Don’t Go It Alone
Research has shown that socially isolated people have a more difficult time recovering from life’s challenges. “The more you hide your problem, the more power it has over you,” explains Bobbi Emel, a psychotherapist in Palo Alto, California. “Being around other people reminds you of who you are; they reflect that you’re still that same person.” That interconnection gives us strength to handle challenges by helping us develop a sense of belonging and purpose — which, when it comes to handling tough stuff, may be the most important component of all.